Create My Event - Event & Party Ideas Blog

Party Confidential

 

Party Confidential: New Etiquette For Fabulous Entertaining is a party planner's modern day alternative to Ms. Post's timeless rules and social graces. Authors Lara Shriftman and Elizabeth Harrison host publicity garnering events for celebrities, Hollywood and Madison Ave. Party Confidential is these party planning pros' follow up publication to Fete Accompli!: The Ultimate Guide To Creative Entertaining.

Chapters include the Starter Course (making a good impression), Party Planning 101 (so, you wanna throw a party? here's how), The Power Host (the hostess with the mostes'), You're Invited (repondez, s'il vous plait!), Mind Your P's & Q's (an fyi for all you pyts) and Guestly Manners (good graces to get you on the a-list).

Lara and Elizabeth share with readers their 10 No-Fail Steps To A Fab Fete. The book also includes celebrities sounding off on all things party, recipes and theme party outlines. The book promises to be the go-to guide for becoming "a consummate host and well-manner guest at every party."

"Throwing a bash is simple, easy and most of all, yes, fun!"
-Shriftman and Harrison

Holiday Teacher Gifts

Gifts during the holidays are tricky, especially if you are on a budget.  Yet, we inevitably try to please everyone and everyone includes your children's teachers (co-workers, the mailman, etc.).  You, as the giver, want to say an extra special thanks for all that the teacher does during the school year with your child.  Or, if it happens to be the school bus driver, the baby-sitter, your secretary or co-workers, it's always nice to give a "Thanks for doing a great job" or simply, "Have a safe and Happy Holiday!" gift that displays this gesture but is not over the top or inappropriate.

I thought of this post after talking with my sister, a middle-school teacher herself, about the types of gifts she gets from her students at Christmastime.  Do not misunderstand - teachers love getting gifts and the gesture is welcomed and appreciated!  Sometimes, though, there are items that provoke a few laughs or a quizzical look/thought. 

Some guidelines:

Chocolate - This is a universal theme enjoyed by everyone.  During the holidays there are always many boxes of chocolates and treats floating around and although a few are a sweet indulgence, too many are a stomach ache.  My sister once received 15 boxes of chocolates from the kids in her class and so the rest of our family got, you guessed it, boxes of chocolate on Christmas morning!  If you would like to give chocolate, pick 3 or four handmade truffles and package them in an ornamental box or create an assortment of single serving gourmet hot chocolates.  Small gestures with big taste!

Candles - Candles are pretty and very seasonal with all of the cozy nights people spend relaxing with family.  If you have found a wonderful, eco-friendly and naturally scented column candle that is in a neutral color and could go with almost any decor (or something along those lines), please give.  But be careful when you are tempted to buy candles in bulk or candles with very strong scents or colors or in odd shapes and figures. If you would not use it as a center piece at a family dinner or as part of your seasonal decor, then chances are the teacher would not either ;)

Christmas themed decorations/goodies - In general this seems like a good idea, because it's the Holiday Season!  But, as a caution, if you wouldn't use the Rudolph the Reindeer themed napkins or the Disney Christmas tree ornament, it's likely your child's teacher might just pack it away, or give it to their Great Aunt Mabel.

Wine and Spirits - My sister thinks getting a bottle of wine or a little assortment of liquors is wonderful.  She says that after long days with the kids, and sometimes long nights with parents at Parent-Teacher interviews, she NEEDS a glass or two.  You do not have to choose an expensive bottle of wine to make a generous gesture and many stores do carry half bottles that are also good gifts for those on a budget.  Also, attaching a recipe for Mulled Wine or Hot Buttered Rum to the bottle you are giving adds a personal and seasonal touch.

Other ideas - Homemade cookies (made by the children themselves so Mom gets a little break), muffins, granola, goodie bags of old fashioned Holiday candies, or even gift certificates for a spa service, a favorite music or movie store or a gourmet food shop.

If these ideas don't work for you, remember, there's nothing wrong with giving an elegant card with a heartfelt Holiday greeting and your child's signature.

Happy Holiday Gift Giving!

Recipes courtesy of the LCBO, pictures courtesy of Martha Stewart and The Wine Enthusiast

Moo

A very long time ago in a civilization far, far away ladies and gentlemen would exchange calling cards when they paid a visit or made a new acquaintance.   Much like handkerchiefs and watch fobs, we don't see the personal card much these days.  Instead, we exchange business cards and email addresses- even in a potential dating scenario.  But when meeting someone new or reconnecting, shouldn't we leave a more personal impression than that of our company's logo and fax number?  Enter the Moo card. 

Moo cards are:  half the size of regular business cards.  100% customizable and personal.  Easy to create and totally affordable at $19.99 for 100 cards.  They are super trendy among artists, bloggers, and now even the forward thinking corporate world is getting in on the action. As the world grows smaller, we need a little social grace and humor to keep us smiling.  Think My Space meets the baseball trading card.

Do they have moo cases?  Actually, yes. 

Check it out at www.moo.com.  by Kate Sinclair of Life In Style.

Here They Come - Those Notorious Office Parties!

Office and company parties seem to start with Halloween and roll all the way through the New Year. Some of us have to assist with planning early when it is a gala or complex event.

Here are a few often-missed planning questions for those organizing office parties to ensure a smooth, enjoyable event.

Is a daytime or evening party more convenient for attendees?

Are you trying to schedule the party to make sure everyone can attend?

Are you providing lots of non-alcoholic alternatives that are attractive and inticing?

Are you suggesting a level of dress or dress code to assist people in making tasteful choices?

Are you including ways for people to mingle with people from other departments and meet the president, CEO or VPs?

Are you trying to include spouses and significant others and children?

Are you trying to make it comfortable for those who arrive a bit early or on-the-dot?

Do you have an organized time in the schedule to thank those hosting the party?

Are you envisioning an event that reflects well on the company? Included here are issues of appropriate location, alcohol flow and taking your employees' interests seriously.  

Can you provide a babysitting service or kid's activities for the event?

Is there a need to give guidence related to gifts? What's been done in previous years? What kinds of gifts were given, and to whom? How about suggesting a shift in the corporate culture toward making charitable donations?

Here's to the office party season!

Hospitality Overnight

WHEW! I just had a spate of overnight guests this summer, so I've been thinking about the art of hosting people from out-of-town. Each guest was different and the revolving door presented different joys and challenges. We hosted many kinds of relationships for overnight stays - from intimate to casual. Thinking ahead on this type of hospitality helps to smooth the waters and make the stay more fun for everyone. Otherwise, you are left exhausted!

Deanna Miller wrote on this topic on Nov 3, 06, entitled “Entertaining Out of Towner's” and it was a good write up. I would add these tips:

Provide a spare house key on fun LARGE keyring, so it is more likely to get returned instead of going with your guest back to Seattle! Or, have a place where the key is hidden.

Various amenities that make your guest comfortable:
Fan / space heater so they can “tune” the room
Extra blankets
Bedside lamp/ night light
Clothes hangers
Free drawer space
Ironing board / iron
Hamper / laundry bag
Trash can
Travel size non-scented liquid soap (hypoallergenic)
Guest water bottles
Extra toilet paper – easily located
Basket with snacks & paper napkins

ALMOST MORE IMPORTANT: from an interpersonal standpoint, here are some ways to make the visits more pleasurable:

Leave a welcome note on their pillow.
A handwritten note, mentioning something specific about how you look forward to their visit with you is sure to start your visit right.

Share your itinerary.
Guests may be with you for a myriad of reasons- from purely visiting you, having job interviews, professional conferences, or attending weddings, and so forth. If you, as the host, have scheduled appointments during their visit, tell your guests in advance (you may choose to invite them along.) Ask if they have schedules as well. If you can use a calendar posted in a common area during the visit, this may help with traffic in your home. If you have meals at certain times and want to include your guest, make sure this is clear.

Creature comforts- food.
If you can, extend free grazing to your guests, it will help them feel more comfortable. Give them an orientation to your pantry and fridge. If there are particular items that are off-limits either store them elsewhere, mark them or state clearly that the items are reserved for something special. A guest who eats all the strawberries will be embarrassed when they were to be a feature of tomorrow morning's breakfast! Ask if your guest has any special requirements, and try to provide options if you can.

You may choose to invite them out to dinner at a restaurant, or they may invite you. By convention, it is always the one inviting who pays. A polite protest can be met with the assurance that "You are our guest for dinner."

Creature comforts - pets.
Make sure your guests know it if you have pets. If they are allergic or have phobias, give them a graceful out to make other arrangements. If guests do not care for your animals, etiquette does not require you to exile important members of your household, but you can try to strike a reasonable compromise. Discussing what pets you have and their normal involvement in your lifestyle ahead of time should handle many of these issues.

The phone, TV, video games and the computer.
Figure out what your comfortable with and notify guests up front about what they can use, how much, and under what conditions. Many guests come with phones and laptops, but think about your items and how hospitable you can or cannot be with them. Providing tourist literature for your town and maps in a basket in their room might keep their Internet requirements at a more reasonable level.

Creature comforts- privacy and bedtime.
Some of us are early-to-bed types or are light sleepers. It is fully within your prerogative as a host to mention ahead of time that you have “quiet hours” in your home. You may ask guests to switch to low-key activities after a certain hour to respect the rhythm of your home.

You may want to provide your guest a “DO NOT DISTURB” sign. You may want one for your door too! Just be sure to let your guest know that if they need you that they can wake you.

Your kids, their kids, our kids!
Depending on the age and temperment of the kids, this potentially adds a dynamic that is only for the sophisticated. Many people find this too complex to manage, and if you are one - it is within your rights to give them a graceful out to make other arrangements.

You do not want to scold or babysit your visitor's kids. All of these types of communications are best discussed with the adults and the parent of the child should take responibility and "the lead." Make sure children are briefed on house rules (no running, jumping, or screaming; where snacking is allowed; what's off-limits; when quiet hours/bedtime is) as you give a rundown of what fun things there are to do. If something will upset you if it gets broken - best to put it away safely during the visit.

At best, you can have a slumber party-like atmosphere for the kids, and it will be fun for them.

One thing about hosting people in this way- it has potential for building lasting memories of an intimate nature, memories that cannot come from hotel stays. People are knit into your life in a meaningful and significant way that is uniquely YOU, because it is sharing in a most personal way.

Graduation Toasts

It's that time of year again where we wish all of our graduates good luck and much success.
While you may be attending some Graduation dinners, here are a few suggestions on a simple and encouraging toast to your Grad.

*“Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail”-Emerson

*“I hope your dreams take you... to the corners of your smiles, to the highest of your hopes, to the windows of your opportunities, and to the most special places your heart has ever known.”-unknown

*“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”-Eleanor Roosevelt

*“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.”-Henry David Thoreau

*“All our dreams can come true...if we have the courage to pursue them.”-Walt Disney

*“School's out, Memories past, Don't ever doubt, Our friendship will last.”-unknown

*“The human spirit needs to accomplish, to achieve, to triumph to be happy.”-Ben Stein

The Host and the RSVP

A failure to RSVP is usually a problem for event and party hosts.

R.S.V.P.- the French phrase "répondez s'il vous plait," means "please reply". An incomplete list of respondents can cause numerous problems for a host, including difficulty in contracts with venues, planning schedules, food, parking, security, people-moving, seating, party favors and more. Sometimes the biggest issue is embarrassment for the host or the guest of honor.

Include the question the extent of your need for RSVPs in early planning phases of your event. If your event is formal or complex or expensive- you must be willing to suffer over your numbers. If you can afford to be hospitable by being more flexible or casual or simple or spending more money (!) - you will have less to worry over with your response rate.

However, we all have times when we want to provide a finely-tuned, high quality experience for guests, and the RSVP is the way to accomplish this. If you have an event that needs all the fine-tuning that a solid RSVP system provides, here are some ideas:

Take ample time on the invitations . Consider it an investment that can really pay off in favorable response for your event. Make the invitations memorable. Color, style, design, scale, a gimmick – consider these as techniques to trigger people's memory. Tune your invitation to the event so that it sets an accurate set of expectations in your guest's mind – for instance, if it is highly formal, you need to stay within formal perimeters.

Time invitations to arrive on a Saturday when people are less pre-occupied.

Hand-deliver invitations if you can.

Give multiple options for RSVPing, like self-addressed/stamped reply cards, a phone number, e-mail address or web portal to reply.

If you need to, set a clear, firm RSVP date. Include a phrase like: "This date cannot extend, promptness is a must. If we do not hear in time we must sadly take you from our list..."

For more formal events, use wording: “We will reserve 4 seat(s) in your honor until April 25, 2007” on the RSVP card. This firmly indicates the maximum number of guests you are inviting and the need for a response.

Cover issues of people bringing children, dates or guests. Never print "no children" or "adults only" on an invitation. The way an invitation is addressed should indicate the names of exactly who - and by omission, who is not invited. Or, one can print: “Adult Reception.” Consider providing a babysitting service for your event if the participation of children presents a problem.

If you are still having difficulty getting RSVPs:

Send out an email or call those you have not heard from by a certain date - it's perfectly acceptable in all guides on good manners.

Use face-saving phrases like:
"It has come to our attention that some people have not received their invitations to our event on May 3, 2007. If you did not receive your invitation, please let me know immediately so we can send another one. Hope to hear that you can attend the event!!"

General ideas for more casual events:

Repetition really helps and is acceptable. Plan to start with a “save the date” notice, followed with an invitation, send a “party details” notice about a week before your event.

Try withholding specific tantalizing information until they RSVP. This withheld information could be the theme, dress code, directions or an address for the party. One party with a Secret Agent theme incorporated this seamlessly and got a great RSVP response.

What hosts should know about R.S.V.P. manners:

Be clear and give good direction. Do not be upset at people if you have not communicated well.

People are obligated to R.S.V.P. any time that they are invited to an event. That does not mean that they know this fact or will comply.

People should respond by the date on the invitation. If there is no date, they should reply within 48 hours.

For formal events, like weddings, provide a self-addressed, stamped response card. For a more casual event, invite a phone call or an e-mail RSVP.

If a guest responds “no” and then finds they can attend, it is appropriate to call the host and explain that they are honored to be invited, that schedules have changed and, if it's convenient, they'd like to attend. Hosts can accept or say no.

If it is an out-of-town event or a financially complicated event, potential guests can call and explain and ask what the absolute latest date to R.S.V.P. is. This is an acceptable inquiry on the part of your potential guest.

For the most part, seeing the RSVPs roll in can be a fun part of planning your event!

End of School Year Thank You Gifts

The school year is rapidly approaching the end. For some lucky kids, summer is in full swing already.
Many teachers still have a few days of clean up and winding down before their school year is officially over. Don't let the year slip away without thanking those who make an impact on your child's life everyday during the school year.

Here is an easy and inexpensive way to thank the special people in your kids life:

Take a digital photo of your child. Print multiple copies and then paste them to a sheet of construction paper. Depending on the age of your child, have your son or daughter help with the gluing.
Next instruct your child to write something nice to each person or draw a picture that represents what this person means to them. For example your child can write 'my bus driver, Mr Hansen gets me to school safely everyday, thank you Mr Hansen!'
They can draw a nice picture next to their picture.
This little project should not take too long and it will teach your children to appreciate what people do for a living and how many people care about them on a daily basis!

Here are some people to consider thanking:
The Teacher
The Bus-driver
The School Nurse
The Principle
The Teacher's Aide
The Janitor

You don't need to spend a lot of money on an 'end of school year gift'. Thanking these people with something from the heart will surely put a smile on their face.

Happy Summer everyone!

The Least Glamorous Place

What is the least glamorous room at a party or event for your guests? It just may be the bathroom! But it does not have to be the case.

If you are planning a large party or event... particularly if there are libations or children - or both... you must think about the loo. Failure to plan here can reflect negatively on the event.

If it is not already included, make sure you have a restroom category in your event planning list. At the very least, plan to have extra supplies that can be easily located by your guests. You may want to increase personnel to cover maintaining your restrooms. Plan to treat men's and women's rooms with the same care and attention, even if you customize it to the sexes- men appreciate nice things in the restroom too!

Be sensitive to the fact that many guests may have fragrance sensitivities and that in a small space like a bathroom you may want to be careful with flower selection, room deodorizers and soaps that are strong.

If you have a strong theme going for your event, bring in decorative elements that are appropriate to the restroom – plan a seamless approach to decorating on into the restroom.

Predictable items for decorating restrooms are candles, flowers and guest towels. But why not try a few other ideas?

IDEAS:

Dimmer Switches: Dimmers are a permanent improvement to your bathroom and an inexpensive way to dial in a bathroom's atmosphere for your parties. They are readily available and can be done by any moderately handy person.

Audio: Plug in a small boom box and give your guests a surprise and additional privacy of theme-appropriate music or a soundscape in the restroom. A recent A Midsummer Night's Dream themed event merely had dimmed lights and played a cricket recording in the restroom, and this was something guests talked about later!

Single-Use Soaps: consider providing single-use soaps for your guests. They are more sanitary for your guests. Large event? Have a basket by the sink with packets of soap leaves imprinted for your event. These use and take packets, available from trade-show give-away vendors, will be a useful memento of the evening. Minimum orders are usually 250 packets. Smaller event? Consider single-use rose petal soaps or beautiful soap leaves from wrapables.com to go with your guest hand towels.

Kid-Friendly: For a kid's party, make sure you have a safe, sturdy step-stool for the sink for the little folks. Use window crayons to write theme-related sentiments or do drawings on the bathroom mirror and/or windows. If you are not good at drawing, use stencils.

These touches may go unnoticed, but they probably won't. Likely, they will provide a strong impression that your guests are thought of and planned for in every way- including in the least glamorous places!

Toasting Tips

You know what spring and summer mean right? CELEBRATIONS! This seems to be the most popular time of year for people to throw big parties. Weddings, Baby showers, Graduation...
Just in case you are expected to declare your joy at the next party by giving a toast, here are some simple suggestions for meaningful and light nod's to the guest of honor.

With the advent of every techie's dream, your sure to have your toast captured by every digital means out there. Unless you want to end up on YouTube or Funniest Home Videos, keep to these simple rules:
1. Keep it Simple- Get to the toast quick. Don't linger on things that others have no prior knowledge or interest in.
2. Keep it Sweet- Remember to be gracious to your guest of honor. There's a time and place for crude humor. Grandpa's 80th is not always the best place for the bathroom jokes...
3. Keep it Sober- Need I say more?? Who hasn't witnessed the awful mess of a bridesmaid or best man as they stumble their way through their train wreck of a toast? Too much alcohol before the toast, and your sure to spill the beans on something much too juicy for this crowd.

Some quick and easy toasts to help get your creative juices flowing.

LOVE & MARRIAGE TOASTS:
"Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner."-Amy Bloom
"Happy marriages begin when we marry the one we love, and they blossom when we love the one we married."-Sam Levenson

IRISH WEDDING TOASTS:
"May your home always be too small to hold all your friends."
"May you be poor in misfortune, rich in blessings, slow to make enemies and quick to make friends. And may you know nothing but happiness from this day forward.

GRADUATION TOASTS:
"As you leave the world of academia and enter the world of reality, remember the best way to change the world is to set an example for others to follow."
"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined."-Henry David Thoreau

ANNIVERSARY TOASTS:
"Here's to you both, a beautiful pair, on the birthday of your love affair"
"Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century."~Mark Twain